Saturday, 16 March 2013

Church Abuse Victims To Smile And Carry On

Catholics around the world are breathing a huge sigh of relief that all the fuss and bother over child abuse may finally be over following the election of new Pope Frances I, after critics admitted he has a “very friendly face” and is “highly unlikely to harm a fly”
The Archbishop of Westminster Vincent Nicholls welcomed the new Pontiff and said…
“I think it’s clear to all right-minded people, even those who claim they were fiddled with, that our new Pontiff  has the face of a cherub and a lovely, lovely smile. How anyone could think badly of the Catholic Church now,  is quite frankly beyond me and no mistake”

The Lawyer representing many of the alleged victims, Veronica Smite QC  told us that…
“I now consider it unlikely any court would uphold these claims following the election of such a loveable looking Pope; as such I  have advised all my clients, to let bygones be bygones, let it go and move on”

 Catholics hope protests like this will be a thing of the past now, thanks to having 'Friendly Frances' at the helm.


  1. Acolyte of Sagan16 March 2013 at 13:39

    Rumours that he and Berlusconi are already recording an album called "Now That's What I Call Untouchable" are yet to be confirmed.